Boogers

Let's get one thing straight. It's never okay to pick your nose. It's a pretty gross habit, and although it has some practicality (like when you have one of those hard boogers that really hurts when you press on the side of your nose, and you just want to get the darn thing out), it's just something you should never admit to. For the record, I am not a regular nose picker; but, ever since i became a mother I'm totally obsessed with picking my daughter's nose.

I mean, she's totally defenseless against the boogie monster that invades her nose rather than her closet each night. The poor kid looks up at me smiling and cooing, and all the while she's breathing like Darth Vader because she's so clogged up in there.

Screw those things they give you at the hospital that are supposed to suction the gunk out. They only work if the boogers are really wet, and even then, it's a battle to stick that thing anywhere near your baby's nose. By the way, my sister, the pediatric nurse, told me about 5 tries in that you actually have to hold down the other nostril as you suction the one that's stuffed. Who knew? I never read THAT in any book.

Anyway, I prefer the SIO method (Sweat.It.Out). One of the earliest memories I have as a kid, is sitting in a steamed up bathroom (for what seemed like hours), to help me get through the Croup. I remember sitting on my tiny, hand-painted "Lisa" step-stool, while my parents sat on the bathroom floor waiting for me to feel better. The first time Livi had an unbearably stuffy nose, I immediately recalled the steamy room and rushed her into the bathroom where we sat with the shower running HOT for 5 minutes. Guess what? Instant wet boogers that just hung out of her nose waiting to be picked!

It's actually kind of scary how excited I get when I actually see one peeking out of her nose. I think, "Oh! One I can grab!" It's equally frightening how often I purposefully look up her nose, searching for boogers. In her Gymboree class, when she's on the changing table, when she's in her crib, when I hold her high above my head as we play....it's an obsession.

So - one other thing they never tell you before you have kids. Be prepared to stick your fingers in their noses (and to love every minute of it!)