Losing Track of Time

For my entire life I have been a watch and time addict. I think my need for checking the time borders on obsessive compulsive. I could be sitting on my butt, watching Ellen, with no where to go, and I just NEED to know what time it is. I once had a friend in college who surprised me one day by reaching over to my arm, grabbing my wrist, removing my watch, and placing it in a drawer - I nearly fainted from the shock. I don't think I made it through the night without having to go to the drawer and sneak it back on my wrist.

Well, a couple of weeks ago my watch battery died. Of course, I discovered this within about 10 minutes of the failure and I nearly died. If you've ever tried to find a store that replaces watch batteries without a hassle, it's not as easy as it seems - and my throat began to tighten as I imagined trying to find a replacement battery with baby in tow.

I spent an evening looking online at watches. I even updated my status on Facebook, exclaiming to my friends that my watch had died....oh "the horror".

And then I weird thing happened.

I forgot all about it.

I totally took the watch off my wrist, and never looked back. It's been about two weeks now and I still have the empty feeling on my left wrist, but no panic that I can't check the time.

What I've realized is that in all of the chaos of learning how to become a mother, I've just let some things go (in a good way). Time being one of them. I've actually started learning to value the time I have, and not to panic about the time that is lost, that is coming up, or that we might be late for. I'm being more intuitive and forgetting about the BIBLE of a notebook that Piyum and I have kept since day one of Livija's life. This little notebook records when she eats, poops, and sleeps and until 2 weeks ago I felt like the walls were caving in if I missed an entry.

Okay, so I cheat a little and check the time on my iTouch which is nearly glued to my being throughout the day; but, I'm pretty proud of myself for figuring out that my days are more about memorable moments than minutes on a ticking piece of silver.

Yesterday, Livija learning how to crawl. I don't know at what time, and I don't care...I'm just glad I was paying attention and not worrying about my watch.